1.  The one who always has to have something drastically wrong with his/her life. You know, the one whose fight with his/her mom turns into “oh-my-gosh-I’m-being-disowned.” The one whose bad dinner turns into the end of the world. And you’re always the problem solver. Not fun at all.

2.  The one who turns your problems into their own. You know the type of person I’m talking about here. You’re sitting there telling them your problem and they’re like “I know! That same thing happened to me! Let me tell you about it even though I know you don’t care…[insert boring story/problem here],” and suddenly you’re stuck with someone else’s issues and your own. Like your own issues weren’t enough to handle.

3.  The one who thinks they’re really good at everything when they’re really not. They’re constantly making you listen to them play the guitar and sing or watch them play football or dance or do some other fake talent that they don’t actually have, and you have to come up with some fake story about how great they are because that’s all they wanted in the first place. And after you tell them how great they are, they think they really are great, and they think you want to watch them again, when in reality you want to run away as fast as you can, but you’re stuck in a vicious cycle of talentless mess and nonsense compliments.

4.  The one who is always fishing for compliments. “Do you like my new haircut?” “Don’t I look pretty today?” Just nod and say yes, even if you want to say no. This type won’t quit until they get the answer they want.

5.  The passive-aggressive one who gets what they want. “What are you getting me for my birthday this year? Cause last year you forgot to get me anything.” Really?! Maybe I forgot on purpose.